Tests

 I was thinking earlier, that maybe we should have tests for parents. Well. Not for parents but rather to be a parent. I’m starting to think that not everyone should be allowed to be a parent. I think there should be restrictions on who can breed. So what about this – we take tests right? Like, the SAT and shit. I think parents should have to take a test. Not like a SAT, but like a PAT. Parental Aptitude Test. You take the test, come back a week later and,

“Oh Mr. Smith, we got your test results in, and uh, you at this time are not qualified for a child. BUT. You can have a turtle.”

“WHAT?!”

“Or you can re-take the test to try and get a cat.”

The world would be a much better place with this system employed. Better parents, and less stray cats on the streets - THUS more songbirds. Brilliant.